When you're feeling drained

What does it mean to feel "drained"?

To drain something is to empty it, like water out of a bathtub. When we say we feel drained, we mean we're running low (or empty), usually on energy, but also at times on hope, on motivation, on ganas.

(Something really interesting to note about the action of draining: it's an emptying that happens by way of pouring out - meaning, you most often find yourself feeling drained when you've just been pouring out: your heart, your effort, your energy, onto other people and things.)

If you, like me, have been in need of a restoration lately, or you've felt the need for a little R&R (rest and relaxation), this is for you.

A little change can make a big difference

Do you like to think about alternate realities, what-if scenarios?

This week started out with a little dose of nostalgia for me. After having spent some time with two old friends who hadn't seen each other in nearly twenty years, I found myself on Monday morning reflecting on people and experiences that had been a part of my life, and no longer are.

I've always loved those stories that involve glimpses into alternate realites - books like Choose Your Own Adventure or Maybe In Another Life, or movies like Back to the Future or Sliding Doors all raise the question -

What if?!

What if she hadn't missed the train that day? What if you choose this or that?

We don't think the little things we do on a daily basis have a big impact, because we're thinking of them as just little things.

How can you tell if you're on track to hit your goals?

How can you tell if you're on track to hit your goals?

Whatever goals you're working on right now, whether you're a student in my Language Semester program and working toward your next level of fluency, or you've set goals for yourself in 2021 (maybe you participated in my story-writing, vision-making workshop in January!), or you've got some other longer- or shorter-term goals in mind, are you on track to hit them?

We often struggle to evaluate our own progress, either because we don't have a good way of measuring non-physical goals, or because we are incredibly biased by our own role as the primary participant!

So today I want to offer you a way to self-survey your progress toward any goal. (Psst...this is the same survey I'm using as I meet with individual language students to check in on their progress this semester! It really works!)

Coaching, Your Best Bilingual Life, SpanishSaturday, MotivationNikki BannisterApril 16, 2021Goals, On track, Self-audit, Survey, Progress, GiftComment

Do you need a teacher, a coach, a guide, or a friend?

At the beginning of every single class, I introduce myself to my students by saying, Yo soy Nikki, tu maestra, tu coach, tu guía, y tu amiga. I'm Nikki, your teacher, your coach, your guide, and your friend.

I will present you with all the new material you need to learn so that you understand it. I will help you put it into practice, focusing on building your confidence and strengthening your mindset along the way. I've already reached the destination you want to get to, and I'll show you the smoothest, quickest route possible for you to get there yourself.

I will support you and would love to share the journey with you long after you no longer need me as a teacher, coach, or guide.

When you sign up for language classes or life coaching with me, my goal is to put myself out of a job. It's my great honor to stay in your life.

Make sure you're getting what you need.

Coaching, Your Best Bilingual Life, SpanishSaturday, MotivationNikki BannisterApril 2, 2021Teacher, Coach, Friend, GuideComment

Lessons from a year in quarantine

A year ago in California, we began a "2-3 week" quarantine and shutdown in response to the coronavirus pandemic. [Spoiler alert: we're still in it 12 months later.]

Let's take some time to reflect on this very odd anniversary.

In my latest video, I share exactly what was going on in my life: what new projects I was looking forward to, and how in retrospect I realize I was really struggling just to stay afloat, financially and emotionally.

Living through a year of the pandemic has added a lot more strain to each of those areas, but it's also allowed me to rearrange how I was handling my business and my pace of life, and to reprioritize my health, relationships, and growth in all areas.

Ultimately...there's been a lot of blessing in this year, for me.

Perhaps there's been some hidden blessings, large or small, for you too?

And yet...I know my experience is not everyone's experience.

Are you trying to outrun a bad diet?

I used to eat a banana after eating a bowl of ice cream.

Later in life, I got into bodybuilding for a period of time.

In the gym (where I was pretty much every day of the week, sometimes twice a day), I would hear the trainers use the expression, "you can't outrun a bad diet."

What they meant was, it doesn't matter how hard you work in the gym: if your diet isn't in order to start with, you cannot, will not get the results you want.

Essentially, it didn’t matter how many miles I ran, or how many bananas I ate, after eating the bowl of ice cream. It mattered that my main diet was ice cream!

If you don't have a strong, good, healthy foundation, it doesn't matter how hard you work. You will not get the results you want.

Do you just need to try harder?

Are you trying too hard?

We use this phrase in English, s/he is trying too hard, as a criticism. It's meant to imply that whatever it is you're trying to accomplish will only come if you relax and let it come more naturally. Don't force it.

And yet so many times when we're not getting the results that we want, we tell ourselves to just try harder.

Instead of telling yourself to just try harder, ask yourself:

How could I give myself more support? ¿Cómo puedo darme más apoyo?

Coaching, Your Best Bilingual Life, SpanishSaturday, MotivationNikki BannisterFebruary 12, 2021Life, Permission, Support, Effort, Self-talkComment

You have permission to lower the bar

Have you heard the saying, "if it's worth doing, it's worth doing right"?

This time of year, many of us are abounding with new goals, dreams, and projects for the new year. We look forward to all the changes this year might bring, all that we might accomplish, and the growth that will occur.

And the overwhelm can almost be immediate.

Because the truth is, we aren't great multi-taskers. We - and I mean you, I mean me, I mean ALL of us humans - are much better at being single-taskers. It's just how our brains work!

So what do we do?

We often start trying to do it ALL, at the beginning. Then, we get frustrated as we realize we're not making the kind of progress we'd like to. We're pulled in too many directions, stretched too thin.

We start to drop things. We put them off. We decide we'll get to it later, when we have the time we want to truly dedicate to it.

This sounds pretty good. Pretty reasonable. After all, if it's worth doing, it's worth doing right, isn't it?

Maybe.

There's a pernicious limiting belief hiding in this mindset: the idea that it's all-or-nothing.

Celebrating YOU in 2020

What are you celebrating yourself for this year?

If your answer right now is, "nothing", let's change that by the end of this post.

Why is celebrating so important? What does it even mean to celebrate yourself?

Our adult brains feel more comfortable skipping the celebration. We feel more responsible thinking ahead. We have perfectionist tendencies that keep us looking for more, setting higher goals.

Stop. Just stop.

It's time to re-train our brains. Because if we skip the celebration, we miss the chance to actually enjoy our life. We take all the pleasure out of the experience.

My Best Bilingual Life